The Emotional Roller Coaster Rides Again...

This adoption stuff is certainly a roller coaster ride. Just when I get my head wrapped around the provincial approval, I find out that it's likely an 18+ month wait from LID (the date your file is 'logged in' with the Chinese government) until referral. AHHHHH!!!

I was starting to tell myself that I might be lucky enough to travel in a year or so, but now that seems unlikely. I'm trying to be positive about the longer wait. More time to save money. More time to do another play (or 2 or 3 or 5). More time to spend with friends, stay out late, go away for the weekend at a moment's notice, eat popcorn for dinner if I want. These are all good things; things I enjoy, cherish, will miss for awhile when I have my baby at home.

The bottom line, though, is that I don't really want to have any more late nights, or weekends away at a moment's notice. What I want is my daughter home with me. I want to go for walks in the park. I want to bathe her. I want to read her favourite book over and over again. I want to sign her up for swimming lessons. I want to sit with her at the piano and make music.

Will this ever happen?